Matt Kahn: Be Gentle With Yourself


Dear Friend,

Through the rational mind, it would seem as if parting ways with limiting beliefs, addictive patterns, and self-defeating behavior would be nothing but a positive experience. While deeply rewarding in the profound relief such healing provides, because most people have spent more time in their human conditioning and self imposed limitations than any time spent in liberation and empowerment, the disappearance and dissolving of human conditioning actually triggers the grief of loss. While it doesn’t make much sense to the rational mind which only understands life by categorizing things as either good or bad, the heart takes much longer to authentically heal the vanishing of the old self. This is much like breaking up with an abusive ex, who even though you know they are not anywhere near the type of empowering partner you are meant to choose, they somehow remain the person you can’t stop missing based upon the amount of time spent together — even when constantly enmeshed in toxic patterning.

I offer these words to help you be gentle with yourself. Just as we wouldn’t dare say to someone who has survived abuse to ‘let it go’ or ‘get over it already,’ the same is true with the time needed to wholeheartedly make peace with the old self that always heals along the wound’s time frame instead of at the speed of personal desire.

All For Love,